Into a book: Twilight: They Shall Die!
by Thecheshirecatrules
Summary: I hate twilight, Yet my friend made me read it, by bribing me. Now I shall go into this terrible book, and torture  or kill  the pixies


**Hey people, heres another story. This story shall be a one shot, but it will also be part of a series. Uhh, confusing right. Heh, I'm an idiot, wait, no I'm not. Oh well. On with the story! **

Twilight, the Pixies shall perish

"...!" My eye twitched as I read a horrible story, 'Death is simple, death is peaceful. But life, life is hard.' I nearly gaged at that. At the school I go to, everyone in my class has to read a book over the summer. Now, don't get me wrong, I love to read, but when Eliie, whom I like to call "Elfy" Had for whatever reason, bribe me into reading 'Twilight'. I'd rather let dracula suck out all my blood and let my soul rot forever in Hell. "Why won't this mary sue of a bitch die already?" Bella was already bitten, let her die! "...Gah! I can't take it anymore!" I was nearly finished with the story (and its not even half the summer, barley even a week) now i'm quiting. I threw the book at the nearest wall, it it hit it with a 'thud'.

"Whats with all that noise!" My mother called from the living room down stairs. I ignored her, and continued to glare daggers at the book. A thought crossed my mind (really, like that ever happens...)

"You know... I think i'm gonna go in that book, just so I can torture all the characters..." Oh! Did I mention I, am a witch. Yeah, Yeah, laugh all you want. But I 'aint like all thoughs other so called 'Witches'. Stuiped hypocrits. Real witches are from a long line of ancient royalty. At birth each member is givin a medalion of some sort, that gives them special energy to use 'magic'. Mines a necklace, it has metal heart hangin from it. With the front of the heart, two angel wings folded together to look like a heart. Though I don't know why its angel wings, one look at me and you would mistake me for a she-demon =) (sorry, off topic :()

I shut my eyes and began chanting in my head, 'Take me to the pits of Hell, take me to the pits of Hell...' Or more clearly 'Take me Twilight...' I soon felt nauseous, and right as I felt like I was about to puke, I fell to the ground with a 'Thmup' The ground was cold, and wet... I could feel the vibrations of people walking around me. I heard murmurs of worryes people. Soo what did I do?

A) I peak open my eyes and slowly get up, telling everyone I was okay...

B) I feign death...

For thoughs of you who picked B), you are correct. I stayed lying on the ground, because from reading the story, (which Elfy made me do, with money!) if I stay down long enough, someone will have to take me to a hospital, and I will me the sparkly vampire father, Carlisle! Wooh hoo...Not.

Finally someone came and by te time I got there it was dark, and trust me that was a long time (It was dawn when I left to the Twilight world, heh heh, dawn, breaking dawn...) So when I got to the hospital, I was just about ready to snap my eyes open and start freaking out, and destroy hospital. by lighting it on fire, of course.

"Alright, she looks fine. do you know how she got there?" I heared a vioce, and if I am right, (which I always am...) It was Carlisle. Yay mister sparkly man, get ready to die! I opeaned my eyes slowly, so that no one would notice. I then silently got off the bed when they went into the hall, Carlisle and the man that brought me here, I snuck out of the room and out to the parking lot.

After finding the 'Doctors' car. Which, if I say so myself... is really easy. I mean, come on, this man is freakin rich! He has a nice car... I crawled under the car, then latched myself to some mechanical stuff... (I'm not good with mechanical, plumbing, just stuff thats has to do with tools. Last week, I cloged up the sink, with seaweed! Come on, Sea weed... how can that clog up a sink? Don't answer that...) After many trys, I got myself to hang from the car. Now I just have to stay there, while its moving... Great...

Hours later... We, Carlisle and I( well, he dosn't know i'm here) got to their house. By their, I mean the sparkly people. You know what, i'm just gonna call them pixies from now on. When the father pixie left the car, which was gladly parked in the garage, and went inside. I dropped from the car,

"Ohf! I Hate this... No one will ever make me do this again." I said, referring to hanging upside down from a car for several hours at a time. "But it will all be worth it soon..." I chuckled evily. And if this works out right, this part will actualy, exept me, be in the book. I ran to the door, which was conected to the house, "Now, how to get in." I looked around the room, eh, garage, for something that will unlock the door. I saw a rusty screwdriver. I walked over to it and lifted it, for examination. "Perfect." A vampire (Pun defently encluded.) grin covered my face.

Now, i know what you're thinking... Erica, Are you going to use magic to turn the screwdriver into a key? Well, I am not. I will unscrew the bolts in the door. Hey! i can't use magic willy nilly. When I finished doing as I just told you I what I would do, I pulled the door handle out of the door (Strong 'aint I?) I then proceded into opeaning the door. I crepted into the house, undetected, of course. I walked throughout the house, till I got to the kitchen. I found a sharp knife on the conter top, "Hun, wonder why thats there, if they never use the kitchen.

I examined the knife, it was a blunt blade. "This wont work." I scowered the kitchen, till I found a sharp knife.

I took the knife and slashed it across my wrist. It stung, but i sucked it up and took it like a man. (Heh, I bet a man couldn't even take it like a man.) Blood spilled every where, and in minutes all the pixies were there. I smirked as they whatched me, and my blook. I then used my 'magic' to make the knife a lighter, which I then used to light the house on fire. just before I burned to Hell with the pixies, I said one thing, "Bye-bye leaches." I blinked and an uneasy feeling washed over me. What felt like an enternity later (Even though it wasn't even a half hour later...) I woke up. I bet you think this was all just a dream. right? Well if it was a dream, then why would my hand be caked in blood. Also, why would there be a lighter in my other hand?

**Well there you go. A Cliff hanger! bet you wish there will be another one. Well to bad. As I stated before, this is a one shot. A twilight parody. I hate twilight, so I like this. The pixies burn in Hell. Hah, die Pixies! The next one wont be a twilight, but it will be where erica goes into another book. **

**Now, review or I shall set the Vampires on you. Hah, Yeah right! Like the pixies can do anything. My dog could hurt more than them. Still... Review. (All flames will be used to roast christmas chicken.) Laters.**


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